My Date with Mr. B

Not that I don’t like the Olive Garden, because I do. I just know that a first date is the date where you want to go somewhere a little interesting or unique. Not that I don’t like the waiting room at the Olive Garden, but he was late. No biggie, but I was a little annoyed. Let face it. If everything went perfect, this guy really wouldn’t have stood a chance.

For starters he was wearing a hat on New Year’s Eve. I kinda wished that he was last night. Not that a receding hair line is a deal breaker, but I just really would have preferred to know what to expect. Again not a deal breaker. He was also super nervous, almost to the point that he talked so quiet, that I couldn’t even hear him. There were several lolls in the conversation. I had to work pretty hard at getting the ball rolling. This should be something that comes natural. We were totally off. You know the dates going bad when you have to resort to the what-albums-would-you-take-to-a-deserted-island-game and your date stops at two. His answers were Guns’n’Roses and Bush. Bush is also his favorite band. Like the Olive Garden, it’s not that I don’t like Bush, but your favorite??? There’s just so much more great stuff out there, it clearly demonstrated lack of variety in his musical diet. When I found out that he had no idea who the Black Keys were and that his favorite concert was Linkin Park and Korn, I knew that we were not going to mixed CD heaven any time soon.

I feel super bad sharing this, but I am certain we won’t be getting to know each other well enough for him to know about my smoking cessation blog and I think ‘Mr. B’ gives him a certain amount of anonymity. He told me he doesn’t have his license. At thirty, this is something everyone should have, unless of course you live in an area where public transportation is so good that it is inexcusable not to use it. The thing that bothered me most is why he didn’t have his license: 13 speeding tickets!?!?!? What? Are we sixteen? He went on and on about his suped-up Nissan that he’d race from time to time. What???? It was so ridiculous, that I didn’t even believe him. Really? Am I a judgmental asshole or is that something that is really cool now and I just didn’t know about it?

We went to go see Up In The Air with George Clooney. Now the movie is good, perhaps a little slow, but I’d didn’t enjoy Mr. B telling me that through the movie. He would not shut up. At one point he actually asked me to high-five him doing the movie. For no reason. I wanted to yell at him:”Excuse me, but do you not see that George Clooney is talking?” Add all that up package it up with an annoying laugh and you have a hell of a night.

Wow. I am such a bitch. He was very nice and polite.

The worst part was I kept thinking about when Mr. Pink and I went to the movies. He talked through the whole damned thing, too. So did I, actually. He had me in stitches. Also the Movie had Danny McBride from East Bound and Down, which is a show that he introduced me too. His role was completely serious, but I couldn’t keep from laughing thinking about his character in the show.

The worst thing about being on a bad date is that it makes you remember all the things that were good about a recent relationship that you are no longer in. I can’t wait for my date on Wednesday.

I have not smoked in my car. Which is pretty awesome, because I totally wanted to light up after dropping Mr. B off. Congrats to me.


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January 2010
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